Grace and Apologies

“I sorry.”

These are the two words my husband and I hear many times a day from my 21-month-old toddler. We’re not really sure who taught him this phrase, but he makes sure to let us know that he is “sorry” as he looks us in the eyes and dumps out toys, repeatedly spills drinks that are on the tables (then asks for a towel to clean them up), drops anything, or makes a mess for the fun of it.

I have noticed that the more tired my son gets, the sneakier and more “apologetic” he becomes. This became apparent last night, when I cleaned up his daily toys along with the rest of the house. At more than 36 weeks pregnant, this task gets harder with every passing day. By the time I finally made my way to the couch to sit down for the evening, two little brown eyes met mine from across the house, holding an entire basket full of toys.

I knew what was coming, but in my current condition, I also knew I was not fast enough to catch him before the inevitable.

While keeping his eyes locked on mine, he turned the tub upside down and yelled, “Crash.” Quickly followed by, “Oops, I sorry!”

Before I could say anything, my husband went to help him clean up his mess, but I couldn’t help but sit there and inwardly giggle at what had happened.

He knew he had done something we didn’t want him to do, and that we would have him clean up his mess. Yet, he (and his developing little brain) still chose to dump out his toys deliberately – and make sure I saw him get the job done.

I wasn’t aware that testing boundaries started so young, but here we are.

However, the truth is that whether it is my 21-month-old son or my 29-year-old self, when it comes to sinning and making choices that we know can hurt God’s heart – we’ve all committed this crime.

In Romans 3:22-23, Scripture says,

This righteousness is given through faith inJesus Christ to all who believe. There is no difference between Jew and Gentile, for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God. (Emphasis added.)

Whatever specific sin we have committed that causes us to fall short of that glory separates us from our holy, loving God.

Maybe we know better than to empty a bucket of toys in front of our watchful mother’s eyes, but what about those little sins we commit – knowing how our Father feels about them?

It could be something simple, like watching a movie or show that we knew went against what we know is right. Or maybe it was letting that little piece of juicy gossip slip from our lips, even though it wasn’t our information to share. What about eating way too much junk food and then being “sorry” only after we had a multi-day stomach ache?

These sins are “small” in the grand scheme of things.

But after we commit them, are we really sorry? Or do we give ourselves a “pass” because these aren’t sins that impact others that much?

Why is that such a big deal?

The big deal is that we know these are sins. And some of these, according to Proverbs 6:16-19, are things that the Lord Himself hates. This passage explains:

There are six things which the Lord hates,
Yes, seven which are an abomination to Him:
Haughty eyes, a lying tongue,
And hands that shed innocent blood,
A heart that devises wicked plans,
Feet that run rapidly to evil,
A false witness who utters lies,
And one who spreads strife among brothers.

But often, in our own little worlds, we forget these specifics.

Somehow, we have devised a scale of “worse” sins that doesn’t include spreading a lie, stirring the pot among our loved ones, or thinking that we are better than everyone else in our circles. In reality, these “little” sins separate us from the Lord just as much as the bigger ones mentioned in this passage.

Thankfully, even when we stumble and intentionally look away (or directly into His eyes) when doing something we shouldn’t, we still have an opportunity to repent. And He still stands ready to forgive us for all of our failures – both big and small.

That is the beauty of salvation.

The Lord knew before we were born that we were going to be dirty, sinful, rotten sinners. Even so, He gave us the best gift of all time: a redeemer to forgive us, though we don’t deserve it.

Although this gift is free and for everyone, we still have to accept it.

By admitting, believing, and confessing our sins, we can invite the Savior of the world into our hearts, and He will forgive all our past, present, and future sins. Even for those of us who chose to follow Him years ago, when we confess and repent of today’s sins, He will still come in and make us new.

As Billy Graham once wrote in an article titled “Things God Hates:”

But no matter how guilty you may be (you may have broken every one of the commandments), God can forgive you today because Jesus Christ died on the cross for your sins. Yes, God hates the evil of your heart, but He loves you. Just as a parent despises the bad behavior of their child but still loves the child, God loathes the forces that would cause you to be lost, but He loves you with an infinite love.

His love for us is infinite – so much so that He sent His only Son to die for us on Calvary so that we could someday live with Him. The only thing He asks is that we say “sorry” for our sins – and mean it.

For God so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish, but have eternal life. For God did not send the Son into the world to judge the world, but that the world might be saved through Him (John 3: 16-17).